I don't think I follow the same time frame as most of my peers. When it comes to achievements in life or simply going on through a certain phase in my life, I'm either late or advanced that it even frustrates me; mostly at myself, mind you.
Today, the Professional Regulation Comission released the 2016 Philippine Psychometrician Licensure Results. For the most part of the day, my facebook feed was filled with posts related to the results, mostly from College friends, acquaintances and Old Professors. My University did pretty well in producing newly minted Psychometricians. Everybody's happy, well everybody that is except for me. Not that I hated the outcome or that I do not want to celebrate with them, it is not also because I am jealous, okay maybe a bit. But it's not particularly because I want to be a licensed psychometrician myself, but mostly because I envy their seeming understanding that it is what they wanted, that license. If I think hard about it, I am not that keen on being a Psychometrician, the field of Psychology is a vast spectrum of discovery that would require years of mastery and I don't think I would miss out much if I pass on this specific specialization. I guess the envy can be rooted on the notion that these people knew what they really wanted and they were so set on achieving this goal and now they have it, I don't have that kind of foresight. The last time I planned something for my future, everything went incredibly wrong that I never attempted to plan ahead again. This maybe the reason as well why I am not that close with my batchmates from College, my closest groups of friends from that time of my life are either older or younger than I am. It must be because I can't help but compare myself with people from my age group *sigh, such a pathetic mind set*, and I know that it shouldn't be that way but as I said I can't help it. Some are climbing the corporate ladder so fast that they are near the top, while the others contently building families of their own and then there's me, almost done with my 20s and still figuring out my way around. It's a sad realization because I know that I am setting up a competition that no one wanted to participate in. It's a crappy habit and I know I should quit it, despair not for I am trying my best to do just that. I should also stop being so hard on myself with these things, I should understand that I just function on a different speed and pacing. Amd tonight, even though it pricks something in me in a funny way, I typed my first congratulatory message to an orgmate, "Mahusay brad, now asan na yung wine ko? Ipagdiwang na yan!"
Note to self: Learn the subtle art of asking for a treat without sound so...sad? Mas linangin ang pagbio ng mga salita.
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I feel down today for no apparent reason aside from the silly reason above. *sigh*
Today, the Professional Regulation Comission released the 2016 Philippine Psychometrician Licensure Results. For the most part of the day, my facebook feed was filled with posts related to the results, mostly from College friends, acquaintances and Old Professors. My University did pretty well in producing newly minted Psychometricians. Everybody's happy, well everybody that is except for me. Not that I hated the outcome or that I do not want to celebrate with them, it is not also because I am jealous, okay maybe a bit. But it's not particularly because I want to be a licensed psychometrician myself, but mostly because I envy their seeming understanding that it is what they wanted, that license. If I think hard about it, I am not that keen on being a Psychometrician, the field of Psychology is a vast spectrum of discovery that would require years of mastery and I don't think I would miss out much if I pass on this specific specialization. I guess the envy can be rooted on the notion that these people knew what they really wanted and they were so set on achieving this goal and now they have it, I don't have that kind of foresight. The last time I planned something for my future, everything went incredibly wrong that I never attempted to plan ahead again. This maybe the reason as well why I am not that close with my batchmates from College, my closest groups of friends from that time of my life are either older or younger than I am. It must be because I can't help but compare myself with people from my age group *sigh, such a pathetic mind set*, and I know that it shouldn't be that way but as I said I can't help it. Some are climbing the corporate ladder so fast that they are near the top, while the others contently building families of their own and then there's me, almost done with my 20s and still figuring out my way around. It's a sad realization because I know that I am setting up a competition that no one wanted to participate in. It's a crappy habit and I know I should quit it, despair not for I am trying my best to do just that. I should also stop being so hard on myself with these things, I should understand that I just function on a different speed and pacing. Amd tonight, even though it pricks something in me in a funny way, I typed my first congratulatory message to an orgmate, "Mahusay brad, now asan na yung wine ko? Ipagdiwang na yan!"
Note to self: Learn the subtle art of asking for a treat without sound so...sad? Mas linangin ang pagbio ng mga salita.
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I feel down today for no apparent reason aside from the silly reason above. *sigh*
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