Monday, 9 February 2015


*spit balling for lack of something to do*

A: I've noticed that you are quite close to male gender, any reason to that?
B: I dunno, I'm straight, so isn't that quite natural?


A: But seriously though, why? You are just different around them. 
B: You could say I am more natural around them. Men do not put up too much pretense when they agree to any kind of relationship with anyone, when they hang-out with you it means that they just want to. I guess an entire household filled with men did that to me.

*Curious glance, a little smirk*

A: Ah, so the expectations? They don't expect anything from you.
B: Nope, incorrect. Everyone expects something from you. But with men, if their expectations are not met they’ll eventually come to accept that and move on to another expectation brought on by the previous one, the bargaining lasts shorter.

*tone getting testy, curiouser and curiouser Alice would say*

A: This is with no respect of romantic feelings, I hope.
B: Of course, romantic feelings put things into a haywire of a mess. I suppose I like being friends with men more than being romantically involved with them, and in that spectrum I find that I am more unabashedly me.

A: Have you really met anyone, a guy for that matter, which wanted anything but a romantic connection with you and actually sustained that relationship?

*at this point person B is silent for a while and contemplating*

B: I guess I have to answer that both with a yes and a no. I’ve found someone yes, but nope we couldn’t sustain it.

*silence, the sharp nails of melancholy is trying to wound the thin veil of absurdity brought on by this conversation*

A: Who lost who?
B: I have no idea. The fact remains, he is far and continuously changing. It’s not the same.

*series of deep sighs*

A: Do you still think about him?
B: Constantly, it’s his birthday today actually.

*a sad smile made an appearance*

A: Are you going to write to him?
B: No. But I may write about him.
A: What would it say?
B: It will speak of the plainness of us. That I miss the people we were, and that I regret that I won’t get to see the people we are yet to be, together.
A: Do you really think you’ll never see him?
B: If he changes his mind, perhaps yes. Trying to reach him is like crossing the great divide. It’s really up to him.
A: Are you waiting?
B: I would like to say I’m not, but I’m not really sure if I am if I say that I am. I’m keeping busy, that’s all I can say.

*the curtains are drawing to a close, the conversation must end*

A: What is he like? And why is he different?
B: He is two-fold of a soul, he is so plain and yet he is made of so many stitches that you have to step back and be amazed of the tapestry that is his personality. When I was with him, I felt that I am safe and that I can be ridiculous and selfish and humble and needy and kind and that I am someone’s little sister, that I am someone’s someone.
A: If he’s here, what would you say?

B: This is my greeting. A happy birthday! Now how about of coffee?

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