Of Cupcakes and With Disappointments

Post originally intended to be published on September 2015. 

I'm finally coming around and finishing draft posts that I have kept hidden for as long as 2 years. Goodness, please excise this one. There are at least half a dozen pending on my draft box. What a lazy bum I am. 

  I caught a glimpse of her as I was walking out of the cafe after the wrap up of the medical mission that I participated in. I slowed down my walk for reasons that I do not know, I felt it was rude to quicken my pace as it is evident that she was bee-lining for me. I stopped on my track when she reached me.

     "I am reading this book and I think I'm going crazy," she said, her voice still musical despite the low tone it posses, like a deep bass, the female version of her father's voice.

     "Uh-huh," was the first sound I could utter, we haven't talked in more than 3 months and I couldn't really come up with a worthwhile small talk to make this encounter any less awkward.

   "I think you should read it, you would understand it more than anyone else," this is an exaggeration coming from a literature major was what my brain said in response, I haven't read properly in the last year because it's hard pretending to be an adult. 

     I can feel her gaze on me and it made me bow down my head, I got so used to not having her around that her nearness kind of suffocates me. I turned my eyes on the cupcakes that I was holding, birthday cupcakes. I can sense that she sensed that I am struggling, so she cleared her throat and tried again. "I will finish the book tomorrow and then give it to you will read it and tell me what you think", I'm not sure if I nodded or if I said something, all I remember is I walked away with an extra dash in my steps. I can be a jerk sometimes. 

     I didn't show up the next day.