Pulu't Gata

Di ko na naman na-a-update ang blog ko. Not that it's should be thing na dapat ay may schedule, but I have promised myself to write constantly and I am really crappy on following promises like that. My last real post was so dark that I was (I think I still am) in a rut for while. I am still contemplating on whether to write about it, hmmm pag-iisipan ko pa yan. 

Anyway, I have posted during my X of 11 series that I was looking for a job, and after being a partial bum for 6 months, I have finally landed on my real adult job. Okay, so you might be reading this and is starting to scratch your head now, thinking "Huh? Di ba matagal ka nang nagtratrabaho? What are you talking about now?" First of all, calm down (hahahaha ang ambisyosa ko lang, thinking that someone's really reading this. So since I am mostly talking to myself here, I'll respond like I am talking to myself as well, since it's normal occurrence naman), yes I have been working since I was 18 (I am 26 now, yay for growing older!) but aside from my 1st job which was so toxic since I was also studying full time at that time, I haven't really felt that I was working since the succeeding jobs that I had after that are either super fun or too loose. This is also the first job that I had that is somewhat related to the degree that I graduated with. My batchmates have all risen up to the ranks, climbing the ladders of their careers and here I am 5 years after graduating from the University and is just easing into the actual field. To say na under pressure ako ay isang malaking understatement.  Back in 2015, I had a plan but circumstances got in the way and I found out that I had to sort those things out first before I can actually focus on this whole job hunting business. 

The task given to me is somewhat daunting and given the new work spectrum of this generation, having a certain position in a certain company doesn't just mean that you'll only be doing the same thing over and over again. The expectation is, if you can do something and/or knows a thing or two about other job descriptions you'll be given some responsibilities to help out. Sa totoo lang, ang daming slash na pwedeng idugtong sa posisyon ko ngayon, but I am not complaining, after all I am all for growth and learning.

I feel sometimes that I am overly eager with what is happening around me. Being 26 and just starting out in a new career path gives me this different pressure and need to prove myself. Minsan pakiramdam ko ang trying-hard ko na masyado. Pero ayos lang, kailangan eh. 

Last February 25, I have just reached my 1st month here in the office and I still feel okay. I mean, sure the stresses are there and tight schedules are to be met, pero sobrang okay lang kasi yun naman ata talaga ang hinahanap ko, ang laging may gawin. Add to that are my co-workers, it is my first time to work in a corporate set up na okay ang mga katrabaho. Natrauma ata ako dun sa huli kong corporate job na di ako kumportable lagi at mas madalas kong binibilang ang mga minuto bago mag-uwian. This time around, the people I work with try to reason with compassion and consideration first before nilang unahin ang mga ere nila. This is something I have been praying for before I set out to apply: nice co-workers, reasonable pay (since I am just starting out) and somewhere close to home ('cause Mama needs me), at di naman naging madamot ang Panginoon, may mga sacrifices but all in all I am pretty contented right now. Actually, I feel too contented and bordering on euphoric happiness with this new job that sometimes it scares me. Baka kasi pag sobrang saya ay may mangyari na naman na di maganda sa huli. Ang negatibo ko lang, kaines! hahaha. 

Must. Remain. Positive. Don't screw this up with that kind of mentality. 

I feel that I am in my honeymoon phase with this new job. Everything is new and everything is a challenge that I am finding myself slumbering off with a smile. I feel glad that I finally arrived here. It took me a while, but I feel that the timing is right. 

Please pray for me!? 

I hope to really update more here. I should not sacrifice writing kahit na sobrang busy ako. That is unreasonable. So, note to self, keep writing and no more excuses.